Update - 7/02 - I didn't win.  Check out the winners  here.

I ran through the damp dank marshes like a bat out of hell with a
monkey on his back, and as the ominous howls of
the hirsute werewolves intermingled with the piercing squeaks of
the vampire bats and the hollow moaning of the evil demons while the
misty fog drifted in from the rolling ocean in endless waves of opaque
white, I realized with horror that I had forgotten to
turn on my answering machine before leaving home that night.

And my comments on the submission:

This one has a little bit of everything - wordiness,
mixed metaphors (Mix metaphors, stir well)
a hook, adjectives galore (they were on sale 2 for
the price of 1 at K-mart!) redundancy, and restating the
painfully obvious - and it sorta rhymes there at the end.
Hey, maybe you could also
consider that last sentence too....naaaaaah, never mind.
 

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