My name is JOHNNY UZUOKA the elder son of Mr. UZUOKA of
Zimbabwe Street who beat up your dad.
This might be a surprise to you about where I got your contact address. I
got your address from the bathroom wall in Johannesburg Middle School.
During the current war against the geeks on Zimbabwe Street from
the supports of our gang leader Robbie Mugabe to claim all the lunch money
he ordered all geeks to surrender all lunch money and milk money to his gang
members and his followers.

My father is One of the best ass-kickers on the block and because he did not
support Mugabes ideas,  Mugabes supports invaded my fathers garage and burnt
everything in the tool box,killing my father's Buick and made away with a lot
of items in my fathers storage shed. Before his felony assault conviction,my father
had deposited in my uncles back yard lunch money in the sum of US(TWENTY TWO
MILLION THREE HUNDRED THOUSAND UNITED STATES QUARTERS).
After the parole of my father, we decided to move to South
Africa Street where he had deposited the money in my uncles yard.

So I decided to contact you sixth graders that will assist me to
move this money out of the back yard because we are not
allowed to dig in his yard.We have
agreed to offer you the chance to walk past the metal shop room without
getting your ass kicked. All I want you to do is to furnish me with your entire personal
phone and fax numbers and locker combination for easy communication.

You can contact me on the above E-mail.Note that this transaction is 50%
Risk free andabsolutely confidential.

Thanks and watch out for the high school seniors,
yours faithfully until we're freshmen next year,
JOHNNY UZUOKA